hazmi has changed. he's not the guy i used to know before; the guy whom love me. he's changed, hell YEA.
why hazmi.... why???
i tried talking to him. ya know, like asking what's wrong with him & why he's been acting wierd & all those stuffs. & he said it was because of the spar here and there. well, MAYBE that's why he's acting strange. but think again. he don't need to put his relationship in that problem don't ya think so?
anyway, let's just put that aside.

so i just leave him alone for a day or two. just letting him be with his friends, ya know... free? lol.
it was the day before yesterday, 17/08/07. he chatted with me. at last! i thought he was back! the guy i knew, i LOVE, is back. he chatted with me, asking what time i ended at school & so on. & apologise for not 'entertaining' me this few days. i was FUCKING glad that he apologised. not saying that it was good for him to apologise lurh, but was glad that the guy i LOVE was back again. that was what i thought. but after all the chat & all stuffs, i have a good feeling that he still wasn't the guy whom used to LOVE me. (although he did call me syg & all)

i don't know why i had this feeling, but i think he's just using me. o.O OMFG! seriously. he still doesn't sound like he love me. ya know, like phrases like, "i syg u la seyy" & all that stuffs. he didn't give me that. also, he didn't even say "bye syg, tc, i lurve you & miss you" and all stuffs when he need to go offline. furthermore, "so kalao i kater tk leh spar psl u tk kasi boleh tk?" don't you think he sounds like he's using me? i don't know why i feel this way. is like, he wanted to last long with me just because of wanting to use me. to like protect him. ya know??

well, of coz i want to last long with him, but not in this situation. i want to last long with him + with love, care. that's true relationship. i don't want him to use me. that's all. just two things in mind:
1) if what i thought is true, and i were to stay with him, he'll get to use me & he'll fool me.
2) BUT if what i thought isn't true, and i were to broke up with him, then i swear that I AM A FOOL.. because i still love him.

you don't know how much i love him. it hurts sometimes.
i'm just too confused. i don't know....
i just hope hazmi & i will last long with true love, care, support & everything. just hope we'll be there for each other. pls GOD! i love hazmi! BADLY!!!

Summary.

I am half-human because I'm a werewolf,
and I'll punch the daylights outta you if you give me bitter chocolates uh.
Just so you know,
I love Taylor Lautner & some day he'll marry me :D

Talk.

Tweeeeet~.

XOXO.

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